Western Time – movie about Sally McRae’s journey at Western States 100

Still from Western Time with Sally McRae

Still from Western Time with Sally McRae

I found Sally McRae some time, maybe little over six months ago, from Instagram. And since then my appreciation for her has just grown every step!

This was the first video that I saw about her running Western States 100 this year, I did hear a podcast with her talking about it couple months earlier, which just made me tear up and smile like a idiot from just pure respect.

The thing about Sally is that she makes me believe in myself, to a whole new level of believing. She is this kind of silent killer, though with a great loud laughter! It was really funny to hear that her laughter is one of the characters that her friends know her for, you hear her laughing before even seeing her… Something I have heard about myself too hahah :D.

I admire who ever is her kind, silent workhorse, something I am working towards with myself.

It was also really inspiring to hear that she has gone through her own personal struggles with the help of running. The way she spoke on the film, made me cry because my journey is so similar, I could relate on so many levels. I have come to the conclusion that quite many runners have gone through something big in their personal life, usually ultra runners even more. Maybe because when you are in a dark and deep hole and not sure how to get up, and then you find something like running that really shows you how you can rise again.

Sally to me is also an epitome of PMA, she shines it through all her cells. Even through hard times she keeps believing, that makes me push myself in believing even when it’s hard.

One thing I really want to bring out, is that she is insanely beautiful in this muscular strong way. For myself that means so much, as when I train more my muscles like to grow and become visible. This doesn’t mean that I don’t respect ladies who run ultras and are slim, no no, but it’s so nice to see someone who is really strong in a visible way and similar to me. Sometimes we all need people to look up to and Sally is definitely that to me!

Billy Yang who made this movie, did justice in all areas that I could wish. He really showed the whole journey of Sally from early age to Western States 100. I love how simple things can make everything so much more beautiful. Less is definitely more.

And the beauty of friendship, this movie really shows that. And these days I know so well how important it is to have good people around you, that believe in you even when you maybe don’t.

Gratitude. Love for what you do. Going through pain because of that love. Friendship. Hard work. Appreciation. Beauty in strength. PMA. ❤

Dedication with Sallys Mom end of the movie.

Dedication with Sallys Mom end of the movie.

 

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Salomon “On The Road” documentary

This is what I dream, yearn, wish, pray to have. Freedom, peace, enjoyment, love for what I do, whatever that might be.

Rickey Gates nailed what I have in me, stored deep and now slowly coming out with huge amounts of fear but more just willingness of try.

Always With Me

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It’s been really long since I last wrote here. My life took a proper turn and then another and then just threw me out from everything I knew.

It’s almost a month since I moved away from Hannover, Germany to Copenhagen, Denmark. With no time to deal or realize what was really happening. Everything happened so fast that I still feel weirded out that I am here. It doesn’t feel real.

It’s been hard, it’s been good, it’s been new, it’s been beautiful, it’s been surprising, it’s been awful, it’s been amazing.

It’s really hard for me to put in to words how I feel and have been going through emotionally.

I don’t think I had any idea how this move would make me feel. Everything was really different than the last time. It’s always an adapting experience and I’m still in the beginning of this one. But this time I left part of my family behind for some time, for time that I don’t know yet. When that hit me, it was really hard to take, a lot of tears.

And this is the reason why I haven’t been writing in so long…

I lost my Granma little over a week ago. I didn’t want to write it, because then it would be little more true. I also didn’t know if I want to tell it to anyone, especially here. She was so much more than just a Granma. She gave me wings. She always pushed me to be me, not anyone else. She was gentle, tough, loving, warm, everything. She made up this amazing fairytale forest when I was small, it was this forest close to my Granparents place, but she made it magical. She made up stories and encouraged my imagination just to roam free and fly. She let me sit in the middle of their raspberry bushes, without no worry. She let me mow the lawn at winter, so I was basically just making awesome lines in the deep snow. She cooked the best food. She tried to teach me how to bake, which I never learned and still suck. She made the most beautiful christmas trees I know, they were always different and even better than the last year. She got up during the night to put my blanket back even though she knew that I will kick it off again. Most of the time we didn’t agree, but she accepted me. She loved me no matter what. She hated my tattoos. She was there for me.

And when she got sick this spring, it kicked the air out of me. To me, my Granparents are people who will never go away. And all of sudden I had to understand that I will loose them someday. Maybe sooner than I wanted to think.

I saw her the last time the week before I moved. She was so happy that I was moving away from Germany, because she saw and knew how unhappy I was there. She wanted me to find a place where I could have a life, where I could be me, where I could be like any normal my age person. And when I moved here, I was thinking all the time that I have to fight for my own happiness finally. That was what she wanted me to do. I pushed myself with her help. For the first time I didn’t want to give up. I didn’t want to let her down, again. I know that in a way she always had hope when it came to me, but I also know that she really hoped that something would finally change with me and how I lived my life.

She was one of the rare people that somehow understood what running meant to me. When I wrote her from London during Hackney Half, that I am running this for you because you can’t, it meant so much to her. Maybe she saw how much I had changed and how much happier and balanced I am because of running.

If this move isn’t hard enough with only all that it brings in my everyday life with everything new, this gut filling feeling if loosing part of you, made this even more challenging. But something changed in me. I wanted to fight for the first time, ever. I didn’t want to give up. And I know it’s her. She pushes me and reminds me to push on, to make myself proud, to show myself what I am capable of. All those things that she knew and tried to show to me, from really young.

I don’t know how to deal this loss. I have never lost anyone this close before. I don’t have the tools for this.

The only things I can do is remind myself of all that I have from her, all those millions of memories, all of her hugs, her tough love that really worked. Be grateful and try to be positive. That is what she would want me to do. To go on with my life and do all those things I am meant to do.

I will honor her and her memory by running the Copenhagen Half for her in two weeks. She will be with me every step. And this is the way that will help me go on with my pain and at the same time I am able to do something for her that she would really love, and she knows that it means a lot to do this for her. And I will lay this medal with her.

It’s really hard to let go, but it’s easier when I think that she is in this beautiful flower garden that she would love. And that she will always be with me.

The day after she passed away, I was walking with my dog and I just knew that I am not meant to run the Berlin Marathon this year. And as soon as I decide that, this huge weight lifted from my shoulders and I knew that it’s exactly what I need to do know. I didn’t feel that I am giving up, it felt right and at this moment I am listening myself more than ever before. I have to be gentle to myself, but tough in the right places too.

In a month, my life changed completely. I got that change that I was dreaming of, to get to another place and hopefully be able to start a life that I dream of. I lost someone who is part of me, but I am grateful and thankful for all. I am fighting and going forward, no matter how hard it feels at times. I have come this far, and it’s not the time to give up. Just listen to yourself. Breath. Think about the positive and breath the negatives out. Be thankful. Be grateful.

I love you, thank you for giving me wings and reminding me that I can. IMG_4624

Interview: Jesica Salyer

This amazing lady, Jesica Salyer, is rocking in ways that I am aiming for. She’s all about keeping it clean, in nutrition, beauty and fitness. I love that she embraces her natural beauty and is truly herself and pushes others to love themselves like that too! She is truly an inspiration and motivation for me to keep pushing on the road I have chosen. She writes a blog called Run On Organic, which is one of my favorites. She has really good reviews and recipes too. And her spirit is just pure joy!Name, age, where you are from, what do you do

Jesica Salyer, 26. Originally from Jupiter, Florida and now living in Leawood, Kansas with my husband and daughter (it doesn’t feel right calling her my stepdaughter–I see her and treat her as my own. She’s a gift).

Why did you start to run?

Running was the foundation of training for soccer–which I was very involved in growing up, mainly for soccer. Initially I had to do it, then I grew to love it and embrace it.

What running has given to you?

Running has given me a multitude of things–the biggest of which is my belief in myself. Running has also shown me that discipline and a strong work ethic make you a better person all around. Running makes me feel passionate and inspired–& on fire! Running is my go-to activity when I am stressed or when I need an answer for something in my life.

Goals when it comes to running?

I’m not a big goal girl. I don’t write things down, I don’t plan workouts. If I had to describe a goal that’s running related, it would simply be to never stop trying and to never lose my passion for running.

Favorite race/race memory?

Without a doubt, running the Garmin Marathon in April ’14. My family was there to support me and I felt so much love radiating around me. It’s one of the highlights of my life. I am proud of myself for persevering, given that I do not have a runner’s frame. I’m 5’9″, 175 lbs–and it was a tough, knee pounding, grueling challenge–I am happy to have experienced it.

Personal golden tip/motto when it comes to running?

Golden tip: what a great way to say that! 🙂 My golden tip(s) for running are multifaceted:
-Don’t ever forget for one second that not everyone on this planet is able to run. It is a GIFT. Not a chore.
-Always find passion in every run. Whether that means looking up into the sky and watching birds fly past you, or watching children play soccer as you pass the park, or simply admiring the lush, beautiful, abundant trees around you–Marvel at your surroundings, feel the tension and power in your legs, feel each stride, be present.
-Run like you do did as a child–free, careless, fearless, exuberant.
Favorite running product?
Since I use them so religiously, I’d have to say my Nike Free TRs, my Lululemon headhugger headbands and my beats headphones. They’re the mainstays in my routine.
Favorite thing (to do) outside of running?
Watching my family smile and laugh. Being on or near salt water.
Guilty pleasure, anything (music/food/drink/whatever) if you have?
Chocolate, greasy fried food, red wine, Sex & the City reruns.
What inspires/motivates you?
Thinking about why I am on this planet. Being a bright, shining light–a ball of joy and happiness. That motivates me at my core.
Favorite song/book/movie/shoe/city?
I really enjoy music. I listen to it while I run, and it takes workouts to another level. It’s very hard to pick one song. How is that possible? I’ll choose 4 of my favorites (2 old, 2 new)
1. Dance the Night Away – Van Halen
2. Scenes from an Italian Restaurant – Billy Joel (Live at Shea Stadium version)
3. Reunion by M83
4. The Veldt by Deadmau5
Books:
-Force of Nature – Laird Hamilton
-My Foot is Too Big For the Glass Slipper – Gabrielle Reece
Movies:
My Best Friend’s Wedding
Rocky
Shoes:
Rainbow brand sandals
Social media:

Bridging The Gap with Hackney Half

Enjoying our time together with amazing friends at Primrose Hill

Enjoying our time together with amazing friends at Primrose Hill

How can I start this… It was one of those weekends. Filled with friends, love, happiness, running, dancing. Also new friends, good food, bike rides, sunrises and smiles.

This was my second Bridge The Gap event, and I was prepared for this one. I learned my lesson in Berlin, when it comes to eating and drinking enough ;). So I had goals, yes eat and drink, but get to that after party and dance my ass off, because I missed that in Berlin due to heatstroke.

But also prepared for not expecting too much, and mostly enjoying the moments without extra craziness. As I wrote after Berlin, I was sadly a bit disappointed in certain things, so this time I was wiser and also was able to let things fly over me without caring. Which made the whole time in London wayyy better. It’s all about learning. 🙂

About that eating part ;). Cronut filled with raspberry  creamy stuff, yum!

About that eating part ;). Cronut filled with raspberry creamy stuff, yum!

The point of this trip was to see friends and run the race. I was so excited to see some friends that I had missed a lot during these couple of months, and how many new ones did I gain, it’s insane how amazing people there are to get to know! When it came to the race, I was so honored to be there for my friend, Jamie, to run his first Half. Sharing is caring and I could not be happier that I did that.

So, I arrived on Friday afternoon, met my amazing friend, Dani and we took my stuff to her place, got bikes and biked to the city. How nice it is to see newish places from that perspective! Best!

Best hostess the mostest!

Best hostess the mostest!

Though obviously I wasn’t ready for the switch of the sides while in traffic haha! But no accidents, only a minor fight with a fence when going over it haha! So, Friday was all about meeting people and eating and chilling. It was just so nice, could not ask for anything better. Night riding through London was pretty awesome.

Saturday came fast with a first Bridge The Gap event, shake out run and bbq. I have been dreaming of running with Run Dem Crew through London streets and now I got that chance :). Not only did I got the chance to run with Run Dem, there were people from NBRO/ Denmark, Patta & Running Junkies/Netherlands, Run Pack & Berlin Braves/ Germany, Paris Running Club/ France and obviously my crew, Still Waters Run Deep :). If I forgot someone, please forgive me.

Sunday! Race Day! Heat! Yes, so Sunday came and the weather was super hot already early in the morning, but this time I was prepared. I had my cap on and water bottle. Days before the race some people were saying that the course is quite flat… How wrong were they haha! It started with a hill and when you were just dead from the heat in the end, there was few hills more. During the course there were so many runners who just collapsed from the heat, so hydration was pretty big deal. We had great race, and the crowd around the course were so amazing, thank you! And when we got to Cheer Dem Crew, all happiness broke loose! I jumped on Ciaran in Berlin, and I warned him that I will do it again and boom, I did it twice! 🙂 That feeling that you get from people you know cheering like their lives depended on it, is insane! Makes you feel like you can do anything, and basically you can!! 🙂

CHEER DEM CREW !!!!

CHEER DEM CREW !!!!

I could not be prouder of Jamie, on how he ran his first half. It was not easy by any means but he pushed through like a champ!! On to the next one!!

Sneezy Panda Yeller and Super Champ!!

Sneezy Panda Yeller and Super Champ!!

I was so happy after the race, so proud, feeling good, surrounded by friends, can you ask for anything better?! And I was ready for the after party 😀 this time nothing would stop me from dancing!

AND THIS IS WHAT YOU GET WHEN I GET TO THE DANCE FLOOR HAHA

AND THIS IS WHAT YOU GET WHEN I GET TO THE DANCE FLOOR HAHA

It feels hard to write down what that weekend felt, it’s a lot. It’s been a week since I came home, got a proper after fun flu and now try to make all those feelings in to a blog post… What I can say is that these days with all these amazing people give me hope, and make me feel like home. I have this huge safety net of friends all over the world. I can be who I genuinely am and I am accepted, that is lucky! Obviously I am “secretly” planning the next racetrip to be able to see my friends again, and make many more. I will leave you with photos and stop trying to explain something which I can’t :). Thank you! You all are amazing! Till the next time! Love and hugs!

Run Dem Crew x NBRO x Still Waters Run Deep

Run Dem Crew x NBRO x Still Waters Run Deep